An Avalanche of Avalanches
by Red Witch
Summary: When a Baby Avalanche Clone from the Mojoverse pops in, it means big trouble for the X-Men! R&R the completed fic and see what happens when his little friends follow him to the mansion!
1. So Much for a Reprieve

**All together now! I don't own any X-Men Evolution or GI Joe characters. Well this little mad fic was inspired by one of my other fics, 'Just Another Week in the Lives of Mutants'. If you've read it you know the horror is about to return. If you haven't go do so. Trust me, it will all make sense…somewhat. **

**An Avalanche of Avalanches**

**Chapter 1: So Much for a Reprieve: **

"I can't believe it!" Scott smiled. "An entire week without Lance running around screwing things up!" 

"You don't have to be so cheerful about it Scott," Kitty told him. 

"I can," Peter grinned. "Who would have thought that Lance would have tried to take a tank on a joyride? Oh wait, everyone!" 

"I wonder when they're going to let him out of solitary confinement?" Kitty sighed.

"If we're lucky never," Scott snickered. 

"I'm going to call Toad and ask him," Kitty sighed as she went upstairs to her room. "At least he had the decency to act sad for me." 

"Ohhh," Peter shook his head. "Even when he gets in trouble Avalanche still manages to get Kitty's attention!" 

"Don't worry about it," Scott patted him on the back. "Hey at least you have a whole week without worrying about Avalanche trying to horn in on a date with you and Kitty."

"Yes," Peter smiled. "This will be a good week. Nothing is going to screw this up!" 

However at that moment in Bayville Park something did happen. A strange purple vortex appeared and opened in a secluded area. Something fell out of the hole in time and space. And as the hole closed, the ground started to shake. 

Not long after a certain group of football players just happened to be goofing off in the park. "Hey Duncan you throwing a party this weekend?" One of them asked.

"You got it!" Duncan smiled. "It's gonna be the biggest bash this town's ever seen! Hey throw the ball!" 

"You got it!" Another one laughed. He threw it at Duncan who ran back to catch it. However he didn't look where he was going and he crashed into someone. "HEY WATCH IT!" 

"Ow," A small boy lay on the ground. He had long brown hair and was wearing a black T-shirt and jeans. 

"Watch where you're going you little squirt!" Duncan snapped. 

"Who are you calling a little squirt?" The boy snapped as he stood up.

"Oh a little tough guy huh?" Duncan got up.

"Tougher than you!" The kid glared at him. 

"Oooh! I'm so scared," Duncan laughed.

"You should be," The boy growled. 

"Why don't you go home to your mommy?" Another player laughed as he shoved him. 

"Why don't you buzz off!" The boy kicked him in the shin.

"OW!" The teenager hopped around on one foot while the others laughed. "That hurts!" 

"What's a matter Blake?" Duncan teased. "Can't handle a little kid?" 

"Hey is it me or does that kid look familiar?" One of the football players scratched his head. "He kind of reminds me of somebody."

"Ah you're imagining things," Duncan told him. He shoved the kid to the ground. "Hit the road squirt!"

At this the boy made a grunting sound and rolled his eyes. "Aw look the little baby's gonna cry," Duncan mocked. Then the ground started to shake. "What the…?" 

The ground shook violently all around them. "Geeze that kid's a mutie!" Blake shouted.

"Now who's gonna run home crying to his mommy?" The boy stood up and stretched out his arm. He sent out a tremor that threw the football players into the air.

"RUN!" Duncan shouted. The other football players did just that. "Let's get out of here!" 

"Yeah we can't beat that thing!" Another screamed as another wave of earth propelled him into the air. 

Soon they were all gone. The boy was alone. He clutched his head in pain and looked around. No one was to be found. 

"I want Kitty…" The little boy sniffed and went off to find her. 

**And so the madness begins. Again. **


	2. Say Hello to Our Little Friend

**Say Hello to Our Little Friend**

"I'm so glad you decided to take me to the park Forge," Jamie said happily.

"Hey it's a perfect place to try out my newest version of my motorized kite," Forge grinned. "I think I finally got the kinks out of it."

"Yeah Professor X was really mad when the last one crashed through his study window," Jamie said as he held the kite.

"I don't know why," Forge shrugged. "And I didn't use that much plutonium to power it. Well this one should work." 

Suddenly the ground started to shake. "What was that?" Jamie yelled. "It felt like…"

"Avalanche?" Both boys said at the same time. They ran towards its source. However to their surprise they only found a five-year-old boy. 

"I don't see him," Forge looked around. 

"Maybe that kid over there saw him," Jamie pointed. He went up to the boy. "Hey kid…"

"GO AWAY!" The boy shouted and flew out his hands. Immediately a tremor knocked Jamie on his butt, creating several clones of him.

"What…?" The boy whimpered.

"Hey there easy kid!" Forge held his hands up. "We're not gonna hurt you. We're mutants too. Where's your mother?"

"Don't have one," The boy sniffed. "I'm alone." 

"You mean nobody takes care of you?" Forge asked. The boy shook his head. "What's your name?" 

"Uh…Lance," The boy sniffed. 

"Wow, his name and powers are just like Avalanche's!" Jamie remarked. "He even looks a little like him too!" 

"Huh?" Little Lance blinked. 

"How would you like to meet some folks just like you?" Forge grinned.

************************************************************************

"Hey I'm off to grab a burger," Scott called out to the kids in the living room. "Anyone want to come?" 

"I don't think the roads are the safest place right about now," Rogue told him. "Logan's giving Kitty a driving lesson."

"Never mind," Scott sighed. 

"Scott! Scott!" Jamie ran in. "You'll never guess what happened! We found this kid in the park! He's a mutant like us!" 

"What?" Scott said. 

"Yeah Forge is bringing him in," Jamie grabbed him by the arm and started to drag him to the door. "Come on!" 

"This I have to see," Kurt went with them. 

"Here we go little guy," Forge led Little Lance in by the hand. "The Institute!" 

"Cool!" Little Lance grinned. "Where's Kitty?" 

"How do you know Kitty?" Rogue asked. "Wait…is it just me or is there something familiar about this kid?"

"What's your name kid?" Remy asked.

Little Lance grinned. "Take a guess!" Then he shot out a small tremor, which shook the house. 

"Oh my god…" Rogue went pale. "I just remembered where we saw this kid before!" 

"That's one of Lance's clones!" Scott yelled.

"His what?" Forge asked. 

"That's right you weren't there when it happened," Kurt said. "Remember when we were sucked into Mojoworld a while back?"

"Oh yeah with that crazy guy who wanted you guys to star in some television shows," Jamie said. Then he looked at Little Lance. "Wait a minute…then that means…" 

"Okay just what the heck are you doing here?" Scott picked him up by the back of his shirt and glared at him. 

"Put me down!" Little Lance screamed. "Put me down!"

"Not until you tell us what's going on!" Scott told him. 

Little Lance glared at him. Then he started to bawl. "THEY THREW ME AWAYYYYYY! WAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" 

"What?" Kurt blinked. 

"They said that I was…de…defective (sob)," Little Lance cried. "That they had tons of me and one weak one wasn't gonna be missed and…and…" He sobbed loudly. 

"You mean Mojo just threw you away?" Jean asked.

"He was gonna…re…recycle me," Little Lance sobbed. "But I got away! I got nowhere else to go!" 

"Creep," Rogue folded her arms. "It would be just like Mojo to do something like that!" 

"Well Mojo can have him back," Scott said. "We have the portal thing so we can send him back!"

"NOOOOOOOO!" Little Lance sobbed. 

"Scott put him down," Jean ordered. She then took Lance from him. "There, there…we won't send you back."

"WHAT?" Scott yelled.

"Come on Scott," Jean said. "He's just a little kid!"

"Correction," Scott said. "He's a little copy of Avalanche! I say we send him back where he belongs!"

"Uh Scott…" Forge played with his fingers. "We really can't do that. The uh…portal machine…well it kinda doesn't work anymore."

"How did that happen?" Kurt asked.

"Well I wanted to see how it worked so I took it apart," Forge gulped. "Then Lockheed kinda got into the mess and melted some of the wires…"

"Oh man," Scott muttered. 

"I'm hungry," Little Lance sniffed. "I'm cold and I want Kitty." 

"Oh for crying out loud!" Scott groaned. 

"Come on," Jean stroked Little Lance's hair. "We'll get you something to eat." 

"You don't hate me?" Little Lance blinked at her. 

"Of course not," Jean said. 

"Now just hold on a minute…" Scott said. "We need to think about this."

"Scott what is there to think about?" Rogue asked. "Even if he is Lance's clone he's still just a baby!"

"I am not a baby!" Little Lance pouted. "I'm five! I'm a big boy!"

"Of course you are," Jean said. "Scott you know we can't let him go. We have to take him in."

"Why us?" Remy said. "Hey he's a Misfit now! Send him to the Misfits!"

"NO!" Little Lance clung to Jean. "I wanna stay here with Kitty and the nice lady!" 

"It's okay," Jean patted him on the back. "Of course you can stay here."

"Well at least until Storm and the Professor get back," Kurt shrugged. "They'll be back from Washington D.C. tomorrow night. We can decide what to do with him then."

"Might as well," Jean said. "Come on kiddo. You like peanut butter and jelly?"

"My favorite!" Little Lance crowed. 

"I have a bad feeling about this," Scott muttered as he followed the others into the kitchen. 

"Oh come on Scott," Kurt said. "How much trouble can a baby Avalanche be?"

"Do you really wanna know the answer to that question?" Scott grumbled. 

Little Lance made an evil grin when no one was looking. This was going to be easier than he thought. He couldn't wait until Kitty came home. Then he knew he'd be able to stay with her forever. 


	3. Little Lance Happy at Last

**Little Lance, Happy at Last**

"Oh come on Mr. Logan," Kitty pleaded as she walked in with him. "I didn't make that big a dent in the mayor's car! He went totally ballistic for no reason!" 

"I will not kill her…" Logan muttered to himself. "I will not kill her." 

"Hey Logan we got a situation here," Rogue popped her head out. "And bring Kitty too! This is kinda her fault as well."

"Oh what did you do now half pint?" Logan rolled his eyes. "Is not nearly killing me and getting the Institute another lawsuit enough for one day?" 

"I didn't do anything!" Kitty protested. 

"Actually you didn't," Kurt told her. "But you do have a little visitor." 

"KITTY!" Little Lance cried out as he ran up to her. He gave her a hug around her knees. "KITTY!" 

"Oh god no…" Kitty went pale. "This isn't what I think it is, is it?" 

"Hi Kitty," Little Lance blinked at her with wide eyes. "Did you miss me?"

"What are you doing here?" Kitty asked.

"Mojo tossed the little guy out into our dimension," Scott folded his arms. 

"He was mean to me," Little Lance sniffed. "He was going to hurt me so I ran away. Can I live with you?" 

"What?" Kitty yelped.

"Oh no!" Logan groaned. "Any of the others tag along?"

"No just him," Rogue told him.

"That's a relief," Logan muttered. "Is that portal contraption still broken?"

"Afraid so," Scott glared at Forge. "Thanks a lot Forge!"

"Hey I told you the dragon did it!" Forge snapped.

"Oh that's right! Blame Lockheed!" Kitty fumed.

"Well it's true!" Forge snapped.

"It is not!" Kitty snapped. 

"Is too!" Forge shouted.

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"STOP YELLING!" Little Lance screamed. "IT HURTS MY HEAD!" 

The ground began to shake. Things started falling off the shelves. Kurt managed to grab a vase but another one broke. The other X-Men tried to stop more things from breaking. Jean used her telekinetic abilities and got a few objects of art. Jamie multiplied and caught more objects.

"I've heard of temper tantrums but this kid has the granddaddy of them all," Forge muttered.

"Lance calm down," Kitty knelt down next to him. "Lance please don't cry. We didn't mean to make you upset."

"No more yelling?" Little Lance sniffed.

"No more yelling," Kitty sighed as she let him hug her. "What do we do with him? We can't throw him out on the street. Maybe we should take him over to the Misfits?"

"Oh no," Logan got an evil glint in his eye. "He's not going anywhere for a while. At least until the Professor gets back. Until then Half Pint he's **your **responsibility!" 

"What?" Kitty blanched.

"Fine with me!" Rogue waved as she left the room. "Just keep him out of my room."

"Yeah I think I can handle that," Scott nodded. 

"But…but…" Kitty pleaded.

"Well you are the reason he's here in the first place," Remy said. "And look how well he responds to you."

"A little too well if you ask me," Peter growled. 

"Guys!" Kitty gulped. "Mr. Logan you can't be serious!"

"Oh yes I am," Logan grinned. "From now on you are in charge of taking care of him. It's called payback kid. And now if you excuse me, I think I'm going out to work on my bike." He left laughing.

"Yeah I can't think of a better punishment for your driving," Jean snickered. 

"Yay! I get to stay with Kitty!" Little Lance hugged her.

"Why me?" Kitty rolled her eyes.

"Probably all your karma from bad driving," Scott snickered.

"Shut up Scott!" Kitty glared at him.

"Yeah shut up Scott!" Little Lance glared at him. "Don't be mean to Kitty!" He then went over and kicked him in the shin.

"YEOWWWW!" Scott yelled.

"Good boy," Kitty grinned at Little Lance. 

"Can we go play now?" Little Lance asked sweetly. 

"Okay I guess I could play with you," Kitty sighed. 

"No right now you need to get him some supplies," Jean told her. "He needs clothes and toys." 

"How about a little straightjacket?" Scott grumbled. 

"I guess we're off to a trip to the mall kiddo," Kitty sighed. "Hey I need a ride! Or at the very least someone to ride with me." 

This was a cue for everyone else to leave the room. Jean looked around and saw that even Scott had run for his life. "Hey it was your idea to take them to the mall!" He shouted. 

"Come on Jean," Little Lance tugged at her hand. "Let's have Kitty drive us to the mall!" 

"Me and my big mouth," Jean moaned. 

************************************************************************

Two hours later Jean stormed in. "If I ever get in a situation where my life depends on Kitty's driving, just do me a favor and let me die in peace!" She shouted to everyone in the living room. 

"I thought it was cool the way Kitty jumped those cars!" Little Lance ran in. 

"You weren't exactly a perfect angel either young man!" Jean whirled on him. 

"What did he do?" Scott asked.

"Turn on the 6 O'clock news!" Jean stormed upstairs. "You'll find out!"

"Jean come back here!" Kitty lugged several bags in with her. "You could have at least helped me carry the stuff in you jerk!"

"Bite me!" Jean shouted as she left. 

"Well that's a new one," Rogue chuckled. "So what did happen?" 

"Well we got to the mall in record time and already Jean is spazzing for some reason," Kitty grunted as she put the bags down. 

"Yeah it was fun!" Little Lance grinned. "Do you know how fast her SUV can go?" 

"Well anyway," Kitty continued as she sat on a chair. "We get in the mall and we start to get him some clothes. Of course he decides to wander away in the middle of it."

"I can't help it," Little Lance told her. "Clothes are boring! She wanted me to try on shoes! Shoes! Can you believe it?" 

"The next thing we know the entire place is shaking!" Kitty went on. 

"I was hungry and the mean man wouldn't give me an ice cream cone," Little Lance sniffed. 

"Long story short we had to feed him," Kitty continued. "At that moment some of those cheerleaders Jean used to hang out with show up and started making comments. And of course **he **had to do something about it!" 

"I was defending your honor," Little Lance said. "It was funny when I used my powers to knock that one cheerleader into a fountain!"

"Yeah it was so funny security asked us to leave," Kitty glared at him. "Well then he runs off and the next thing we know we're chasing him and a hundred security guards are chasing us throughout the entire mall! And of course he's wrecking everything with his powers. It was a total disaster!" 

"I can imagine," Scott winced. 

"Well somehow we managed to catch him and get him out of there before the cops arrived," Kitty sighed.

"Yeah it was cool to hear their sirens!" Little Lance climbed up on Kitty's lap. "And then we drove right through this guys house to make a getaway!"

"It was a shortcut," Kitty told them. 

"Wow Kitty can you teach me to drive like you?" Little Lance asked happily. "I can't wait until our first driving lesson!" 

"I can't wait until the Professor comes back and sees this," Rogue snickered. 

"This is gonna be harder than I thought," Kitty moaned. 


	4. The Tremors of a Toddler

**The Tremors of a Toddler**

Logan had made it a point to stay out of the mansion all day. He grinned every time he felt a tremor run through the mansion and an exasperated shout from Kitty usually followed. Then he decided to go get a drink of beer. He went into the kitchen and towards the refrigerator. "Hey! Where's my beer?" He growled.

"Little Avalanche's idea," Kurt told him as he munched on a strange looking foodstuff. "He said that alcohol was bad and poured all of it down the drain."

"HE WHAT?" Logan snarled.

"He does have a point," Kurt said. 

"Kitty just let him do that?" Logan snapped.

"She helped him," Kurt told him. "Hey want a bite? It's my latest creation; a marshmallow and candy topped hot dog with pizza sauce. It's pretty good. Want some?" 

"No…thank you," Logan had a strong stomach but even this made him feel queasy. He walked out of the kitchen. "So you wanna play hard ball huh Half Pint? Fine with….WHAT THE….?" 

There was his bike. His precious bike was in the pool. And Little Lance was splashing water on it (The shallow end of course). "Hello!" He waved happily.

"KITTY!" Logan shouted. 

"Uh Mr. Logan," Kitty gulped as she ran up. "He got away from me for just a second when…" 

"MY BIKE!" Logan's jaw dropped.

"I made it all clean," Little Lance was completely wet. "I'm helping!"

"GET HIM OUT OF HERE!" Logan howled. 

"I'm not even gonna ask how you got it in there," Kitty dragged the boy away. "Come on. Let's get you dried off." 

"My bike…" Logan looked like he was going to cry. "My poor bike…" 

"Come on now, let's get you dried off," Kitty sighed as she took him away from Logan before he cut him up into tiny pieces. "We gotta find a towel and some clean clothes for you." 

They went inside and she gave him a towel. She started to rub him dry. "Now why don't you wait right here while I go find some clean clothes for you?" Kitty told him.

"Okay Kitty," Little Lance smiled. When she left he looked outside and saw Kurt, Scott and Peter playing football outside. He grinned when he had an evil idea. He went outside. He purposely grabbed some dirt and caked himself with it. Then he ran and used his powers to knock the boys down. Then he grabbed the football they had dropped and ran off. 

"GET HIM!" Peter shouted. They chased him around. Little Lance threw the ball away and they still chased him. Peter managed to catch him and grabbed him by the scruff of his back. "Okay you little…" Peter growled.

"PUT HIM DOWN!" Kitty stormed out.

"But…" Peter said. 

"Put him down! Now!" Kitty snapped. "What did you do to him?" 

"THEY WERE MEAN TO ME! WAAHHHHHH!" Little Lance sobbed.

"You jerks!" Kitty snapped.

"But…but…"Scott gulped. 

"How could you pick on a little kid like that?" Kitty snapped.

"All I wanted was to play with them," Little Lance sniffed. "But they called me names and threw me in the mud and chased me around…"

"Oh you're not gonna buy that are you?" Scott asked.

"He's lying!" Kurt said. "He attacked us!"

"Sure Kurt a five year old attacked you," Kitty said sarcastically. She looked Little Lance over. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine Kitty," Little Lance grinned.

"But you're covered in mud! You need a bath," Kitty grumbled. 

"Okay," Little Lance nodded. "You can give me one."

"Oh no," Kitty backed off. "I can't give you a bath!"

"Why?" Little Lance asked.

"Well because, because you're a boy and…Oh boy," Kitty groaned. She looked around. "Guys…"

"Oh look at the time! I need to work on some homework now!" Kurt made a show of looking at his watch and teleporting out. 

"Don't look at me," Scott said. 

"Peter," Kitty asked. 

"No way!" Peter backed off.

"But I really need your help!" Kitty whined. "Please? For me?"

"Kitty I love you but there are things even I won't do," Peter told her. "No way, no how am I giving him a bath!"

************************************************************************

"I can't believe I am doing this," Peter grumbled.

"This isn't exactly a perfect situation for me either," Little Lance frowned as he sat in the tub. 

"Hold still," Peter grumbled as he scrubbed the boy.

"You're doing it too hard!" Little Lance whined. 

"I can do it a lot harder if you don't stop splashing around!" Peter snapped. Little Lance then splashed some water in his face. "That's it! You're going down!"

"Try and make me!" Little Lance growled. 

The next thing everyone in the mansion knew there was another rumbling sound. The door to the bathroom burst open and a huge spill of water burst out. Little Lance ran out completely naked. "Can't catch me slowpoke!" He laughed. 

"COME BACK HERE AND PUT YOUR CLOTHES ON!" Peter shouted as he chased him through the halls. 

"Oh boy," Rogue blanched as the small boy streaked by her. "Now there's a question I wish went unanswered."

"What?" Tabitha asked. "What Rocky looks like naked? I already knew that." 

"I'm not even gonna ask," Rogue groaned. 

Meanwhile Hank had just walked out of his laboratory. "I can't believe I spent the entire day in the lab," He sighed. "I never wanted to be one of those people who stayed indoors all the time. Well now I am going to go out and see what's going on in the world."

"CAN'T CATCH ME SLOWPOKE!" Little Lance streaked 

"I think I'll go back inside now for a few weeks," Hank turned and started to reenter the lab. 

"Get back out here Hank!" Logan stormed up to him. "If I have to put up with this so do you!"

"Dare I ask what is going on?" Hank winced as the sound of something breaking rang through the hallway. 

"Not really but I'm gonna tell you anyway," Logan sighed.

************************************************************************

"Well he's finally asleep," Kitty trudged in the kitchen later that night. "It took two stories and a lullaby but I finally managed to put him down for the night." 

"I'd love to put him down," Peter grumbled. "Permanently."

"You know you guys could be a lot less like jerks you know!" Kitty fumed.

"Kitty's right," Jean said. "Even if he is a clone of Lance he's still just a little boy."

"You can't tell me you're siding with that little lunatic!" Scott yelled.

"He's just a child!" Jean snapped. "Look at it this way, it's kind of like a second chance for Avalanche. Maybe all he needs is a loving family."

"No what he needs is a kick in the pants," Peter grumbled. 

"Kitty's right," Jean said. "You guys are jerks!" 

"I'm going to bed," Kitty yawned. "I had no idea that looking after a little mutant could be so exhausting." 

"Not to mention talking to a bunch of thick headed boys!" Jean huffed. 

Both girls left the room leaving Scott, Peter, Kurt and Remy behind. "Seems like the Little Avalanche has a way with the women," Remy said. 

"I can't believe this!" Peter grumbled. "Even when he's not here Lance somehow manages to cause trouble for us!"

"This kid is even worse than the real Lance," Kurt grumbled. "He's even got the girls on his side! Not just Kitty!" 

"Yeah at least with the real Lance we could hit him," Scott grumbled. Then the mansion began to shake again. "Now what?" 

"Oh man this is the worst tremor yet!" Kurt gasped as everything fell off the shelves. "Come on!" He grabbed both Scott and Peter's hand and Remy hung on to Peter. They teleported upstairs. 

"Three guesses what's causing it!" Scott said. He burst into the guest bedroom. Little Lance was bawling in the middle of his bed. "Geeze! Kid knock it off with the tremors!" 

"I…want…Kitty!" Little Lance howled as the entire room shook violently. 

Kitty phased into the room. "Lance! Lance stop it! Stop shaking the place!"

He did so and reached out to hug Kitty. "Kitty…" The boy whimpered. 

"It's all right," Kitty soothed the small boy. "It's okay. It's okay. What did you guys do to him?"

"We didn't do anything!" Peter protested.

"He was like this when we found him!" Scott told her. 

"Kitty," Little Lance sniffed. "I can't sleep. I had a bad dream."

"Really?" Scott looked around. "We didn't notice."

"Can I stay with you?" Little Lance pleaded. "Please?" 

"No way!" Peter snapped. "Forget it!" 

"Peter will you calm down!" Kitty told him. "Can't you see the little guy's scared?"

"I don't wanna be alone," Little Lance whined. "I don't want the monsters to get me!" 

"Don't worry they're scared to death of you," Remy grumbled. 

"Kitty pleeeeeeeeeeeeassssee?" Little Lance begged. 

"Oh all right," Kitty sighed. "You can stay in my room. But just this once okay? Then you have to go sleep in your own bed like a big boy." 

"You can't be serious!" Peter snapped.

"Peter what am I supposed to do?" Kitty asked as she picked him up. "He's scared okay?" 

"But…but…" Peter's jaw dropped as Kitty took him to her room. "You can't do this!" 

"It'll be okay," Kitty told him as she put the boy in the bed. "Now remember Lance, it's just for tonight. Okay?" 

"Okay," Little Lance cuddled next to Kitty. "Night, night." 

"If he's staying so am I!" Peter snapped.

"You are not!" Kitty fumed. "Now come on I really need some sleep here." 

"Come on," Scott said as he, Kurt and Remy dragged Peter out of the room. "We all need to get some sleep!" 

"I don't believe this!" Peter roared. "HE'S IN HER BED!" 

"Pete he's only five," Kurt yawned. "Not even technically." 

"He's doing this on purpose just to spite me! I know it!" Peter wailed. 

"Colossus, get a grip," Remy grumbled. "Even you can't get jealous over this!" 

"I never thought I'd say this but I miss the real Lance!" Peter moaned. 

"I am getting out of here," Kurt muttered as he walked away. 

"Look I'm sure that everything is all…" Remy began to say when Peter put his finger to his lips. They opened Kitty's door slightly. Kitty was already asleep. Little Lance was cuddled up to her. Then he opened his eyes and made and evil grin. Then he stuck out his tongue at them and made an L shaped sign with his thumb and forefinger. He cuddled closer to Kitty.

"He…did…do it on purpose," Peter hissed. "I'LL KILL HIM!" 

"NO!" Remy and Scott snapped as they held him back. 

"You're not gonna accomplish anything if you charge in there!" Remy told him.

"This is war!" Peter broke out of their hold and stormed down the hall. "WAR I TELL YOU!" 

"I wonder when Lance gets out of solitary confinement?" Scott groaned.


	5. More Mayhem in the Mansion

**More Mayhem in the Mansion**

The next morning some very cranky X-Men were sitting down at the table for breakfast. "Scott I said I was sorry I missed Danger Room practice," Kitty said. "But I couldn't leave Lance here alone." 

"You gotta admit she has a point," Logan growled. "I don't want that kid running around loose anymore!" 

"More Fruit Loops!" Little Lance squealed with delight. He held up a nearly empty bowl. 

"Where did you get those?" Kitty blinked. "I swear I can't turn my back on you for one second? What was wrong with your porridge?"

"Porridge is yucky," Little Lance made a face. 

"It is not!" Kitty told him. "It's good for you. Do you have any idea what's in this stuff? The sugar alone is enough to rot half the teeth in your head!"

"Sugar?" Hank gulped. 

"But I like sugar!" Little Lance squealed. "It makes me happy!" The ground shook in testament to his happiness. 

"WHO FED THE KID SUGAR?" Logan shouted. 

"He did!" Kurt pointed to Ray. "I saw him do it!" 

"Hey you also gave him a powdered doughnut!" Ray snapped. "And I saw him sipping on some Pixie Sticks Forge had!" 

"Pixie Sticks!" Scott yelled.

"You gave a five year old pixie sticks?" Jean yelled. 

"I didn't give him any! He swiped them from my back pocket!" Forge defended.

"What were you doing with Pixie Sticks anyway?" Rogue asked. 

"Hey they're a great pick me up," Forge shrugged. 

"Oh it's gonna be a long day!" Logan groaned. "When's Charles getting back?"

"Late this evening," Hank sighed. He then noticed that Lockheed was scampering on the table, sampling some of his food. "Lockheed! Down!" 

"There's another one of Kitty's little disasters," Kurt grumbled. "Lockheed get away from my food!" He put the dragon down on the floor. "And don't give me a hotfoot!"

"Here dragon!" Little Lance said happily, holding a piece of bacon for Lockheed. Happily Lockheed romped over and ate it. "Good boy!"

"Lance don't feed Lockheed table scraps!" Kitty said. "Now leave the table and wash your hands."

"Okay!" Little Lance hopped down off his chair. "Come on boy!" Lockheed followed him out. 

"Kitty we have to do something," Scott said. "He's only been here one day and Avalanche Junior is already causing havoc on the mansion. Not to mention disrupting your life." 

"Yeah that's something I want to talk about," Kitty fidgeted. "I need to finish up some homework as well as some other programs the Professor wanted me to work on while he was gone. Would you guys mind playing with him until I'm finished?" 

"Are you out of your mind?" Kurt asked.

"Of course we will," Peter said.

"We will?" Kurt asked.

"Yes we will," Peter grinned. He looked at the other boys. "I think it would be a good idea to spend some time with the darling boy. Get in some quality time," He gave a surreptitious wink to the boys without Kitty seeing. 

"Oh yeah," Scott got the hint. "Fine. We'll watch him." 

"Ya we'll watch the kid," Kurt nodded. 

"I think playing with the kid ought to be fun," Remy grinned.

"I have a bad feeling about this," Rogue groaned. "Just what are you boys up to?" 

"For crying out loud Rogue you're getting just as paranoid as Scott," Kitty got up from the table. 

"All clean!" Little Lance trotted in and showed her his hands. "Can we play now?"

"I need to do some work first," Kitty explained to him. "But you can hang out with the guys for a while. Okay?"

"Don't worry Kitty," Peter grabbed Little Lance and gave him a squeeze. "We know how to take care of him. Come on fellas." They all left.

"Well that's a relief," Kitty sighed as she made her way down the hall. "Now I can get some work done." 

"First you have to clean up the bathroom," Hank pointed. 

"What?" Kitty looked inside and saw the entire bathroom was a mess. "Oh!" She slapped her hand to her forehead. "LANCE!" 

************************************************************************

"Put me down!" Little Lance struggled to get loose of Peter's grip. "Put me down!" 

"I don't think so," Peter told him. "Now let's have a little talk shall we?"

"Yeah we know your little game," Remy told him. 

"You think you can pull a stunt like that and have Kitty all to yourself huh?" Peter asked. "Well it's time you had a little lesson on how to control those powers of yours." 

"What are you gonna do about it?" Little Lance growled. 

"This!" Peter put the boy over his knee. 

"NO! NO!" The boy squirmed, trying to get free. 

"Get in a few good licks for me mon ami," Remy grinned. 

"I should have brought a camera," Scott grinned. 

"This is going to hurt you a lot more than it's going to hurt me!" Peter raised his hand. "You…YEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW!" He jumped in the air just as Lockheed sent a blast of fire right at Peter's behind. He dropped Little Lance and tried to put out the small blaze. "THAT HURTS!" 

"Colossus! Switch to armor form!" Remy shouted. 

Peter did so. "Ahhh! That's better! What the…?" Even in armor form he blushed a scarlet red when it was revealed that Lockheed had burned a hole right through his pants and underwear, revealing a very sore pair of metal buttocks. 

"Talk about buns of steel huh?" Little Lance snickered.

"Why you little…" Peter growled as he advanced on the boy. 

"Try it!" Little Lance sent out a tremor. "You're not gonna catch me!" 

Peter fell on his backside. "YEOW!" He moaned. 

"Get him!" Scott shouted. They started to chase after Little Lance until Lockheed dive-bombed them, spewing fire. 

"He and Lockheed have joined forces!" Kurt yelled.

"It's an ambush!" Scott shouted as Lockheed dived right at them. "Oh great! Now the garden's on fire again!" 

"Can't catch me!" Little Lance laughed as he ran away. 

"Oh yes we will!" Peter got up and shook his fist. "And when I get my hands on you I am going to…"

"Uh Pete," Remy gulped as he looked behind him.

"Not now Gambit," Peter told him. "That little rock tumbler is going to pay for this!" 

"Uh maybe you should change pants first," Scott gulped.

"Oh don't mind us," Tabitha grinned. She and Rogue had walked up behind him. "We're admiring the view!" 

Immediately Peter used his hands to cover his backside as he whirled around. "Excuse me please," He walked away backwards. "I need to change." 

"What's going on out here?" Kitty walked up behind Peter. "PETER WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR PANTS?" 

"Uh…Uh…" Peter was now a bright red. "Excuse me Kitty, please!" He ran inside. 

"Oh my," Kitty blinked. She turned red as well. 

"Well that was a nice view of the full moon," Tabitha snickered. 

Meanwhile Little Lance had managed to sneak inside the mansion. "Ha! Those dopes will never catch me! WHOA!" He yelped as a pair of hands grabbed him. "What the heck?" 

"Hi there Number 12," Another Little Lance glared at him. "Did you really think you could get away with this?" 

**Just when you think things can't get any crazier, they do! Keep reading and reviewing to find out more! **


	6. It Just Got Worse

**It Just Got Worse**

"I can explain," Little Lance #12 gulped.

"I'll bet," A Little Lance said. 

"Did you really think that you could get away with it?" Another Little Lance snapped. 

"So you thought you could get the real Kitty all to yourself huh?" Still another Little Lance asked. 

"Nice try buster!" Yet another Little Lance snapped. "Well now it's our turn to have some time with Kitty!" 

"YEAH!" They all ran off to search for her, each one going in separate directions.

"This could be a problem," Little Lance #12 gulped. 

Not too long afterwards…

"Get out of my room you little creep!" Tabitha shoved Little Lance out.

"Sorry! I thought Kitty was in here!" Little Lance said. 

"Just stay out and don't touch my stuff!" Tabitha said.

"Yeah right like I'd be caught dead with your girly things," Little Lance said as he went down the hallway.

"What's wrong with him?" Rogue asked as she walked by, munching on some chips.

"Caught the little rock head in my room," Tabitha told her. "Cool are those that new brand of honey BBQ salsa ranch chips I've been hearing about?" 

"Yeah you wanna try one?" Rogue offered her some.

"Can I have some?" Little Lance walked by.

"No you have enough artificial stuff in you," Rogue said.

"Is Kitty here?" Little Lance asked. 

"I just told you no!" Tabitha grumbled. "Now get lost!" 

"Old grouch!" Little Lance stomped away. 

"I swear he's such a pain!" Tabitha said as she chomped on the chips. 

"Hey wasn't he wearing different clothes this morning?" Rogue asked. 

"Ah you know how kids go through their clothes," Tabitha waved. "You know these are really good!"

"Is Kitty here?" Little Lance walked up to them. 

"For the last time no!" Tabitha snapped. "Will you stop bothering me?"

"Why what'd he do?" Another Little Lance walked up to them from the other side.

"He keeps pestering us about Kitty so tell him…." Tabitha started. 

Both Rogue and Tabitha looked at the first Little Lance, then at the second. "Rogue…" Tabitha asked nervously. "What exactly is in these chips?" 

***********************************************************************

"I will kill that little…" Peter swore in Russian after he changed pants. "No first I kill that dragon, **then** Little Avalanche, **then** I go after the real one!" 

"Hey there," Little Lance walked up to him. "Have you seen Kitty?"

"DIE!" Peter shouted as he started to chase him. Little Lance ducked behind a corner. "All right! Where are you?" Peter shouted as he ran down a hallway.

"Over here!" Little Lance popped his head out of one door and stuck his tongue out. 

Peter ran to the room and tried to open the door. "Let me in you little…" 

"I'm over here stupid!" Little Lance laughed as he popped his head out of another door. He closed it just before Peter got there.

"If you don't let me in I will break the door down and then I will break your head!" Peter snapped. 

"Hey I'm over here!" Lance popped his head out the first door. Peter ran to that one. 

"No over here!" Little Lance stuck his head out another door and shut it. 

"All right…" Peter looked around. "How is he doing this?" Then he saw Little Lance run down the hallway. "HEY! COME BACK HERE YOU!" 

"Peter what's going on?" Jamie asked him as Peter ran by. 

"Multiple! I need help!" Peter said. "Help me catch him!"

"You got it!" Jamie went with Peter and they chased Little Lance into another room.

"No way out," Peter blocked the door. "Now we have you!" 

"I got him surrounded!" Jamie made three more clones of himself and surrounded Little Lance.

"No we got you surrounded!" Five Little Lances popped up from their hiding places. 

"What the?" Peter's jaw dropped. 

"Since when could he do that?" Jamie yelled. 

"This…is not right here," Peter gulped. 

"Look will somebody take this kid from me?" Logan walked in with another Little Lance under his arm. "He's driving me nuts and…" He stared at Jamie and Peter and what they had. "Oh no…" Logan groaned. "Please tell me that I'm drunk or hallucinating."

"If you are then so are we," Peter told him. 

"Logan!" Tabitha shouted as two more Little Lances were chasing her and Rogue. "Help!" 

"How many more of these kids are there?" Logan snapped. 

Twenty minutes later…"Okay I think we've got them all in that one room," Jamie panted. "I think…" 

"What's going on?" Kitty asked. "What's all the shouting about?" 

"Kitty…we have a problem," Peter told her. The ground shook again. "A very big problem."

"What did he do now?" Kitty sighed. "Where is he?" Peter pointed to the door. "You are in such trouble Lance," She snapped as she opened the door. 

"HI KITTY!" All the Little Lances shouted out at the same time. 

"Oh god no…" Kitty moaned. 

"This is not good…" Scott gulped. "Definitely not good!" 

"Ya think?" Peter shouted.

**Coming up, more Little Lance Lunacy! Will the mansion survive an assault of Avalanches? What happens when tiny Rocktumblers go on a rampage? Read and review to find out! **


	7. Not Enough Kitty to Go Around

**Not Enough Kitty to Go Around**

"Is this all of them?" Logan asked.

"Da," Peter sighed. "Every last one of them. We searched the entire mansion." 

"This is a nightmare," Kitty moaned as she watched all the Little Lances run around playing with various objects and breaking them. "How many of these guys are there?"

"Nineteen," Kurt groaned. "Nineteen Avalanches running amok in the mansion." 

"Just think Kitty this could be your future," Tabitha quipped. "A lot of little Lances running around!" 

"That's so not funny Tabitha!" Kitty glared at her. "Okay where's the one that started this whole mess?"

"That's easy," Rogue pointed. "The one that's wearing a different outfit." She pointed to the Little Lance wearing a red and blue outfit. All the others were wearing black T-shirts and jeans. 

"Okay you," Kitty glared at him. "What's the big idea?"

"Yeah something tells me you weren't exactly truthful with that story you told us about Mojo throwing you away," Scott growled.

"Is **that **what he told you?" A Little Lance sided up to Kitty. 

"So what did happen?" Scott folded his arms.

"Easy," The Little Lance next to Kitty said. "He decided to go and have the real Kitty for himself. We've all been missing you Kitty. Especially since Little Lance #13 got the Baby Shadowcat to be his girlfriend. I'm Little Lance #1. Would you like to go on a date with me?" 

"This is not happening," Kitty groaned. 

"Play with me Kitty!" Another Little Lance grabbed her hand.

"No play with me!" Yet another Little Lance grabbed her other hand.

"She's playing with me!" The first Little Lance snapped.

"No me!" The other one said.

"Hey I wanna play with her!" Little Lance #12 said.

"You've hogged her enough!" Little Lance #1 snapped. 

"Yeah we want a turn!" Another Little Lance snapped. "Fair is fair!" 

"MINE!" Both Little Lances pulled on Kitty's hands. 

"MY KITTY!"

"NO SHE'S MINE!" 

"MINE!" 

"MINE!" 

"KITTY IS MINE!" Little Lance #12 stomped his foot.

"NO SHE ISN'T!" All the Little Lances shouted. "SHE'S OUR KITTY! WE LOVE YOU KITTY!" 

"I gotta get out of here!" Kitty screamed as she phased out of their grasp and ran out of the room. 

"Okay so now what do we do with them?" Rogue asked.

"KITTY!" The Little Lances cried as she left. The mansion started to shake violently. 

"Forge I want you to try and fix that portal device!" Scott snapped. "We are sending them all back where they came from before the mansion collapses!" 

"No way!" Little Lance #1 shouted.

"You can't keep us from our Pretty Kitty!" Little Lance #12 snapped.

"Wanna bet?" Scott growled.

"Bring it on!" Little Lance #1 growled back. "Avalanches! Formation Number 7!" 

"Uh oh," Logan started to back away as the Little Lances moved into a troop formation. "This is not gonna be easy." 

"ATTACK!" Several Little Lances shouted as they leapt at Scott. 

"GET THEM OFF ME!" Scott shouted as he was dragged down by a group of Avalanches. 

"Okay this stops right…" Rogue started to move towards them while removing her gloves. However several other Little Lances threw a tremor knocking her into the wall along with several other X-Men. 

"Let's find Kitty!" Little Lance #12 used his powers to make a hole in the wall. "Follow me men!" They all fled through the hole. 

"Oh man we gotta stop them before they do some real damage!" Bobby yelled.

"It's a bit late for that!" Jean muttered as she sat up. She had been thrown against the wall as well. "Scott!" She got up and ran to his side. 

Scott's clothes were torn and he was in a fetal position. "Too many…Avalanches everywhere…" He whimpered. "Kicked me…very hard… right where it hurts…ow…" 

"Well I know somebody besides me who is going to have nightmares for a month," Peter grumbled. 

Meanwhile Kitty had fled to another room downstairs. "KITTY!" A Little Lance spotted her. "Over here guys!"

"Oh no!" Kitty phased through the wall and ended up in the garage. "I gotta get out of here!" 

Suddenly there was a hole in the wall. "Don't leave us Kitty!" Little Lance #12 called out. "We need you!" 

"Why are you following me?" Kitty moaned. 

"Because you're the Kitty," Little Lance #1 said. 

"You're our whole world," Another Little Lance said.

"We need you!" Little Lance #12 said. "You're our Queen!" 

"I'm what?" Kitty choked.

"ALL HAIL QUEEN KITTY!" The Little Lances all cheered. "ALL HAIL QUEEN KITTY!" 

"I can't handle this," Kitty fainted dead away.

"Kitty is ours!" Little Lance #12 shouted.

"Let's take her away from this dump and find a kingdom for her!" Little Lance #1 said. Several Little Lances picked up her unconscious form. 

"You little rock tumblers ain't going nowhere!" Remy appeared. 

"Out of our way!" One Little Lance said. "We need to take our Queen away from here!" 

"There's no way you lot are getting past Gambit," Remy growled. 

"Wanna bet?" One Little Lance growled.

"I got an idea," Little Lance #12 grinned and whispered to his brothers. 

"That's a very good idea Number 12," Little Lance #1 smirked. "A very good idea." They all advanced on Remy.

"Oh no you don't!" Remy started to charge a card but they all pounced on him at once. "Get off Gambit you little…Hey! What are you doing? No! Don't! Stop it! Cut it out! You wouldn't! You couldn't! Stop it! NOOOOOO!" 

"Ha ha!" Little Lance #1 laughed in triumph as he held Remy's underwear over his head. "That'll cut him down to size!" 

"To the Avalanche Mobile!" One shouted.

"What's that?" Another asked.

"Whatever car we can swipe!" The first one told the others. "Let's take that one!" 

"Let's rock!" Little Lance #12 shouted as they took Kitty with them.

"COME BACK HERE WITH GAMBIT'S CLOTHES!" Remy screamed as they somehow hot-wired the SUV and tore out of the garage. 

"I think they went this way!" Hank said as he walked in the garage with Tabitha, Rogue, Scott and Jean behind him. 

"Remy?" Rogue asked. "Where are you?" 

"Back here," Remy moaned as he poked his head out behind Scott's car. 

"What are you doing playing around…?" Rogue asked as she walked closer. 

"Don't come any closer!" Remy shouted. 

"Why?" Rogue asked.

"Are you hurt?" Hank asked.

"Only Gambit's dignity," Remy grumbled. "They took my clothes!" 

"They what?" Rogue blinked.

"You heard Remy," Remy growled. "They all pounced on Remy at once! Couldn't fight them off and the next thing I knew…" 

"You mean you're…" Tabitha raised an eyebrow.

"As a jaybird," Remy growled. "Somebody please get Gambit some pants!" 

"Well this I gotta see," Tabitha started to walk over to the car.

"Nonononononono!" Remy squealed. "Stay back! Rogue! Help Gambit!" 

"I dunno," Rogue grinned. "It's not often we get to see you with your pants down. And in this case…" 

"Very funny," Remy snapped. 

"Uh as much as I'd love to torment him all night we have bigger problems," Jean told them. "Where's Kitty?" 

"With the maniac munchkin brigade," Remy grumbled. "They took off in your SUV!" 

"They what?" Jean whirled and looked around. She ran to the edge of the garage. "Oh no! The front gates are open! They must have used their powers on them!" 

"Oh dear god," Hank gasped. "They're loose!" 

"And they have Kitty!" Kurt gasped.

"AND THEY HAVE MY SUV!" Jean shouted. 

"NOT TO MENTION GAMBIT'S PANTS!" Remy shouted. "Could somebody please get me some clothes! It's freezing in here!" 

"Okay it's confirmed," Scott gulped. "This is officially a disaster!" 

"We've got to find them!" Rogue said.

"How about finding Gambit some clothes first?" Remy growled. "Gambit can't go running around in his birthday suit!" 

"Why not?" Tabitha grinned. 

"X-Men let's suit up!" Scott shouted. Several X-Men ran out the door. 

"Easy for you to say!" Remy shouted. "Hey! Don't leave Remy here!" 

"Oh we'll keep you company," Rogue smirked. "Right Tabitha?" 

"Yeah," Tabitha grinned. "Think of this as payback for all the times you 'accidentally' walked in on us girls changing. 

"That was only once!" Remy pleaded, trying to cover himself with his hands. "And it was an accident!" 

"Yeah right," Tabitha snickered.

"Now let's see what we have here," Rogue walked closer to the car. 

"Stay away!" Remy shouted. 

"Okay that's enough," Kurt teleported next to Remy. "Show's over!" He took him and teleported him to his room. 

"Darn," Rogue snapped her fingers. 

"Oh well," Tabitha shrugged. "There's always those pictures Althea and the other Misfits have."

"Yeah we can buy some of them later," Rogue agreed. "But for now let's go help the others! With all those little Rock Heads on the loose they are gonna need all the help they can get!" 

**Next: What happens when a lot of Little Lances take on the town? Big trouble! **


	8. The Mini Mutant Mob

**The Mini Mutant Mob **

"It will be good to get back to the mansion," Xavier told Ororo as she drove the car back that night. 

"Yes," Ororo nodded. "Hopefully things went well at home. Wait a minute, isn't that Jean's SUV?" 

The vehicle in question was swerving wildly down the street, nearly crashing into several cars. As it drove by the limo both Ororo and Xavier could see a small familiar looking brown haired boy driving it. Another carbon copy of the boy stuck his head out the window and made faces as they drove away. 

"I did not see that," Xavier moaned. "I did not see that! **Please **tell me I did not see that!" 

"If you mean you didn't see those children stealing Jean's van I'm afraid you did," Ororo said. "Who were they? They looked familiar."

"They should," Xavier sighed. "I got a brief glimpse of their minds. Remember the Avalanche clones back in Mojoworld?"

"You mean…?" Ororo's jaw dropped.

"Yes, somehow they managed to get to our universe," Xavier put his head in his hand. "And I think they have Kitty on board." 

"Oh no…" Ororo moaned. "Look!" She pointed and flagged down the X-Van. 

"Storm! Professor!" Scott and the others appeared in full costume. "This is gonna sound strange but did you see…?"

"Jean's SUV with several immature Avalanche clones in it?" Xavier finished the question. 

"You know huh?" Scott groaned.

There was a rumbling not that far away. "I believe so," Xavier sighed. "Storm, see if you can fly ahead. Gambit and Rogue come with me. The rest of you go ahead in the van." 

Gambit took control of the car and started to drive. They told him about Kitty and the Avalanche clones. "And then they swiped Jean's van and high tailed it outta there!" Remy finished. "They're crazy! Kept saying that Kitty was their queen."

"In a way she is," Xavier sighed. "Apparently these clones' mindset is based on the real Avalanche's most basic desires and instincts. Naturally they would fixate on Kitty."

"Not to mention their appetite for destruction," Scott said. He spoke on the two-way radio in the X-Van. 

"There's graffiti everywhere!" Kurt pointed to the streets and the buildings. There were red squiggles and several slogans written in tiny letters. MUTANTS ROCK! MUTANTS RULE! DOWN WITH THE X-GEEKS! ALL HAIL QUEEN KITTY! AVALANCHE ROCKS! 

"Oh yeah this will really win the public over to our side," Rogue grumbled. "Oh my god! Look!" 

Both car and van stopped and looked at the destruction of a familiar building. One side of the walls had crumbled. "It's Bayville High!" Bobby pointed. "What's left of it."

"He did it again," Scott groaned. "Just what is it with Lance and wrecking schools?" 

"Lance Alvers always did have a troubled mind," Xavier sighed. "Naturally his clones would retain the hostility he has towards school." 

"How much you wanna bet we get blamed for this again?" Rogue grumbled. 

"We have to find them before they really do some damage and hurt someone!" Jean remarked. "Good thing this was the weekend and there's no one around that I can sense!" 

Ororo flew down. "I found them," She remarked. "Follow me. They're heading down Lakeshore Road."

"Lakeshore Road?" Jean remarked as they drove there. "I know where that is that's…oh no!" 

"Hey isn't that…." Scott looked up the road. "Duncan's house?"

"Yeah… and it looks like he's having a party," Kurt said.

"Oh no…" Jean moaned. 

"You don't think…?" Kurt asked.

"I know," Jean frowned. "A few of them are in there already. I can sense them." 

"Why am I not surprised?" Scott moaned. "It would be just like Alvers to crash a party. Wait, you said a few of them. Where are the rest?" 

"I'm sensing that they're scattered but it's hard to pinpoint their minds," Xavier said. "Their thought patters are more erratic than the real Avalanche's. We need to spilt up. Storm and Rogue, you take to the air and search. Cyclops take Jean, Iceman and Gambit up to Duncan's house. Try to keep a low profile." 

"Oh yeah right," Scott groaned. "We'll blend." 

"The rest of the team will search the surrounding areas," Xavier remarked. "We have to find them."

Suddenly a tremor shook from the inside of Duncan's house. "Something tells me finding them won't be that big a problem," Scott muttered. 

As they left however they did not notice that they were being watched. "Comrades I believe we have found what we were looking for," A whispered voice spoke. 

**So now who's watching these guys? And what will happen next? Stay tuned! **


	9. Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Hav...

**Just When You Thought it Was Safe to Have a Party**

"So much for keeping a low profile," Scott groaned as several kids fled the house. "Come one we'd better go inside." There were only about seven kids left in the house including a certain jock. 

"SOMEBODY GET THIS KID OUT OF HERE!" Duncan screamed as he hopped around on one foot. Then he saw the X-Men. "What the hell are you freaks doing here? And what is this? Halloween?" 

"I know this sounds strange Duncan," Jean asked. "But have you seen any unusual kids around here?" 

"You mean that?" Duncan pointed to a Little Lance munching on some chips. "What are you freaks doing here? Get out of my house!"

"Gladly," Scott told him. "Just as soon as we get our little friend over there and any other kids that might be around here."

"You mean there's more muties here?" A football player yelled. 

Jean ignored this. "Okay you," She told the Little Lance. "Fun's over!" 

"MOMMY!" the Lance clone ran up to her. "He was mean to me!" He pointed to Duncan and stuck his tongue out at him.

"_Mommy_?" Duncan yelped. "Jean who is this kid?" 

"I'm Lance Jr.," The boy grinned. "This is my mommy."

"I AM NOT YOUR MOMMY!" Jean shouted. 

"Oh my god! Jean has a kid!" One girl gasped.

"And that Alvers nut is the father!" Another girl squealed.

"He is not!" Scott snapped.

"Oh for crying out loud Summers look at him!" Blake the football player said. "He looks exactly like Alvers and he has the same powers! Who else's kid could he be?" 

"Okay technically he is Alvers' kid," Scott groaned.

"_Technically_?" Duncan yelled. 

"It's a long story," Jean grumbled. 

"Uncle Scott's my new daddy now," The Little Lance clone grinned. "After Mommy told my other daddy to take a hike because she found someone better." 

"That's not true!" Jean snapped. "That's a lie!" 

"Oh yeah and you've always told the truth huh Jean?" Duncan snapped. "Just how old is this kid?" 

"Jeeze Duncan she was probably making time behind both you and Summer's back!" Blake shouted. 

"I always said she was a slut," Mindy the cheerleader said. 

"I AM NOT!" Jean shouted. "I don't have a kid! He's not mine!" 

"Hi there!" Another Lance clone ran out. "This place is great! It has a lot of breakable stuff!" 

"Oh you're right Jean you don't have a kid," Mindy sniffed. "You have two kids!" 

"Hey guess how many clothes I can fit in the clothes dryer before the machine explodes!" A third Little Lance ran out. 

"Three of them?" A cheerleader yelled.

"TRIPLETS?" Duncan yelled. "You're the mother of **triplets** and all this time you never told me!"

"There's a lot of things she never told you," Mindy sneered. "My god, these things are breeding faster than you can blink! What are they? Mutants or rabbits?" 

"Mommy said we came from heaven," The Second Lance clone said. "We're five years old!" 

"FIVE YEARS OLD!" Duncan yelled. "Where the hell were they all this time?" 

"We live in the basement," The Third Lance clone said. 

"You do not!" Jean snapped. 

"I always said Jean was too good to be true!" Mindy snapped. "Not only is she a slut, she's a lousy mother! Mutants shouldn't be parents anyway!" 

"Thank god I wised up and dumped her," Duncan moaned.

"OKAY THAT'S IT!" Jean put her hands to her head. Immediately all the kids in the house stood still with vacant stares. "You will remember only this: You all got drunk and decided to trash the house! No mutants ever showed up here at all! Got it?" She whirled around. "And as for you three little lunatics, you're coming with us! Bobby if they make a move, freeze 'em solid!" 

"Let's go kiddos," Remy grabbed one Lance clone and the guys each grabbed another. 

"Somebody's not happy," One Little Lance said. 

"Don't start with me you!" Jean snarled. "I bet you thought that was funny didn't you?"

"What?" Another clone asked. "Can't take a joke?"

"You don't want to know what I would find funny right now!" Jean snapped. 

"Uh Jean…" Scott blinked. "You think that was a good idea erasing their memories like that?" 

"Scott there is no way in hell I am going to be known as an abusive mother! Let alone the mother of Lance's demon spawn!" Jean snapped at him. 

"You have to admit the lady has a point," Remy chuckled. 

"Well three down," Scott sighed. "Sixteen to go. But where are they?" 

************************************************************************

Kitty finally roused herself from unconsciousness. "Where am I?" She looked around and saw that she was in some kind of small shack. There were flowers everywhere and candles. "Oh great," She muttered. "What did they do to me?"

Then she heard the sounds of a scuffle outside and a cry of pain. "Now what?" Kitty groaned as she sat up and the door opened. 

"Hello Kitty!" A tiny metal person walked up to her. "We're here to save you!"

"Baby Colossus?" Kitty's jaw dropped. "What do you mean we?" She saw the rest of the Baby Colossus Gang behind him. "Oh god no!" 

"NOW WE HAVE KITTY!" They all cheered. "HOORAY!" 

"Not again!" Kitty moaned. "I am so out of here!" She phased through the wall and ran for her life. 

"I think we frightened her," One Baby Colossus said. 

"You think?" Another snapped. "But we have to save her from the Evil Avalanches! Forward!" 

"Not so fast!" A group of Avalanche Clones popped up. "You may have gotten the drop on some of us! But not all of us!" 

"Let's rumble!" A Little Lance Clone shouted. 

Kitty could think of nothing other than running. She didn't get very far when she saw the other X-Men. "Guys!"

"Kitty!" Peter reached out to her. "Are you all right?"

"Just peachy," Kitty moaned. "Where are we?"

"Duncan's place," Scott walked up to her with his group and some Lance Clones. 

"Hey she got out of the boathouse!" One Little Lance clone remarked. They heard a loud rumble. They turned and saw the small boathouse collapse. 

"Oh goody another building got wrecked," Kitty muttered. 

"See Kitty, Avalanche is nothing but trouble!" Peter remarked. "What more proof do you need?" 

"Oh really?" Kitty pointed. "Then how do you explain **that**?" To their horror a mob of Avalanche clones were brawling with a mob of Colossus clones. 

"IT'S THE ENEMY!" One of the captive Lance clones shouted. 

"Get them!" Another captive clone shouted and they broke free of the X-Men in order to join their brothers in battle. 

"Okay, this was unexpected," Peter gulped. 

"Oh great," Scott moaned. "Now we have **both **mobs of Baby Avalanches and Baby Colossuses running amok!" 

"Colossuses?" Bobby thought. "Shouldn't that be Colossusi or something?"

"What do we do? We gotta get them under control before they tear up the landscape!" Tabitha said. She barely dodged a crack in the earth. "Let me rephrase that…" 

"I suggest tear gas, knock out gas," Logan said. "Some very large grenades! Whatever it takes in order to stop 'em!" 

"We can't stop 'em," Rogue said. "But Kitty can!" 

"Me?" Kitty yelled.

"You're their queen, remember?" Rogue told her. "They'll listen to you!"

"Kitty is ours!" The Colossus clones shouted.

"NO SHE'S OURS!" The Avalanche clones shouted back.

"OURS!" 

"OURS!" 

"OURS!" 

"SHE'S OURS!" 

"OVER OUR DEAD BODIES!" 

**"ALL RIGHT! THIS IS YOUR QUEEN SPEAKING! ALL OF YOU STOP FIGHTING AND SHUT UP!"** Kitty shouted. 

Both groups did so. They stood there quietly. "All right you!" Kitty snapped. "Now as your queen I am ordering all of you to come back to the mansion right now and no more funny business! Got it?"

"Yes Kitty," They all said. 

"All right! Move it out! Move it! Move it! Move it!" Kitty ordered with the effectiveness of a drill sergeant. 

"Remind me never to get on Kitty's bad side," Bobby remarked as they loaded the kids in the van and car and drove back to the mansion. 

"What do we do with them now?" Kitty asked. "We can't keep them!"

"We may not have to," Xavier pointed at the driveway. "It looks like we have guests." 

"Oh no…" Logan groaned when he saw who was there. "This is all we need!" 

"I knew they'd be here!" Baby Wolverine stood proudly. He turned to his two companions. "Didn't I say they'd be here! The nose knows!" 

"Hey guys!" Longshot waved. Spiral was also with him. 

"Told you they'd be here," Baby Wolverine said. "I'm the bestest tracker in the world cause I'm the best at what I do!" 

"Oh god no…" Logan groaned. "Of all the times to be out of alcohol!" 

**Coming soon, the insane conclusion! **

Kurt:  Is there any other kind in her fics?


	10. Ain't Nothing Like The Real Thing

**Ain't Nothing Like the Real Thing**

"Are we ever glad to see you guys," Kurt sighed. 

"Yes now take them away!" Kitty pointed to the mini mutant mob. "PLEASE!" 

"Don't you love us Kitty?" Little Lance #12 whimpered. 

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" All the Lance and Peter clones cried. The ground shook as it reflected the Little Lances' emotions. It shook so hard half of the institute's windows shattered. 

"Oh no…" Kitty moaned. 

"Don't worry," Longshot said. "We've figured out a way to keep this from happening again."

"What you're gonna lock 'em all in concrete vaults?" Logan asked. 

"No," Longshot smiled. "The problem in the first place was that all of them wanted Kitty for themselves. So…" He pushed the button on his portal machine. Suddenly dozens of miniature Kittys appeared. 

"Oh my…" Kitty blinked. 

"Look at all of them!" Rogue gasped. "Now my worst nightmare has come to life!" Kitty gave Rogue a death glare.

"Kitty…" One of the Little Lances blinked.

"HI!" All the Kittys sang out. 

"KITTY!" All the boy clones sang out cheerfully. Soon each Peter/Lance clone was with a Kitty clone. They were hugging each other happily. 

"Aw that is so cute," Tabitha grinned. 

"Ugh that is so nauseating," Rogue groaned. 

"I don't know why we didn't do this in the first place," Longshot shook his head. "Okay kids! Back to Mojoworld!" 

"Bye Kitty!" All the Little Lances and Little Peters left with their new girlfriends. 

"Sorry about all this," Spiral said. 

"See ya around," Baby Wolverine waved. "If you need your butts to be saved again…"

"We'll call someone else!" Logan snapped as he shoved him into the portal. 

"Well see ya around X-Men," Spiral waved. "Gotta herd these little guys off. There's a new musical Mojo's putting on with the X-Babies."

"Musical?" Scott asked.

"It wasn't his idea," Longshot sighed. "Trust me, you don't want to know. See ya later!" He went into the portal with Spiral and disappeared. 

"Well at least that's over with," Logan sighed. They all went inside. 

"Thank god the nightmare is over," Scott moaned. 

"Yeah all that's left is the clean up," Remy sighed. "Big surprise."

"Well at least we know that's one thing both Lance and his clones have in common," Peter grumbled.

"Hey your clones did quite a bit of damage you know," Tabitha said. 

"Don't remind me," Peter grumbled. 

"Well Kitty if anything you learned what it was like to be a parent," Hank said. "Think of it as a learning experience!" 

"Believe me this is one lesson I will never forget!" Kitty moaned. 

"I don't think anyone will forget these past couple of days," Scott muttered.

"Yeah including Jean," Bobby snickered. "She was almost labeled an unfit unwed mother of mutant triplets!" 

"Say what?" Tabitha asked. 

"I'll tell you all about it," Bobby smiled as they took off for another room. 

"I swear the next time I see Lance pray that I don't hurt him," Jean told Kitty as she stormed off. 

"I think we all need a break," Xavier sighed. "I know I do." 

"I just don't want to hear the name Avalanche for a long time," Kitty moaned. Then the doorbell rang. "I'll get it." She did. And then she made the loudest scream of her life.

************************************************************************

Ten minutes earlier…

"I can't believe you told her I was locked up and in solitary confinement!" Lance shouted at Todd as he put his jacket on.

"Well you didn't want her to know you had another one of your attacks," Todd defended. "And it was all I could think of at the time."

"Great now she thinks I'm even more of a delinquent than ever," Lance grumbled. 

"Fine then next time I'll tell her the truth," Todd said. "I'll tell her you were having seizures and…"

"NO!" Lance whirled on him. Then he softened. "But I just wish you could have thought of something a lot less…"

"Believable?" Todd raised an eyebrow. "How about this? You tell her that it wasn't really you that was doing those bad things but Cobra sent over a synthoid clone of you to infiltrate the base."

"Oh come on," Lance groaned. "Do you really expect her to believe that?"

"Hey she bought the tank story," Todd said. "And considering our track record it isn't that much of a stretch." 

"Oh man," Lance rolled his eyes. "Yeah like I'm gonna use that lame excuse. I'm outta here."

"Where you goin'?" Todd hopped after him. 

"I'm gonna go see Kitty," Lance put on his Mass Device Watch. "Boy will she be surprised to see me!" He pushed the button and teleported to the X-Mansion's front door. He rang the doorbell.

A very tired Kitty answered the door. "Hey Kitty!" Lance grinned and waved. "I'm back!" 

Kitty's eyes grew wide and she let out an ear-piercing scream. "**NOOOOOOOO!**" She ran away in terror. 

"Kitty!" Lance ran after her and was stopped in the hallway by Scott.

"Alvers?" Scott looked at him. "Is that really you?"

"Yeah it's me," Lance glared at him.

"I thought you were locked up in solitary confinement?" Scott asked.

"Uh…that was a mistake," Lance gulped. "You see there was this synthoid clone running around and…" 

"Oh man am I glad to see you!" Scott gave Lance a hug. 

Peter walked in and saw Scott hugging a shocked Lance. "Is that?"

"It's Lance!" Scott said happily. "He's back!"

"YIPPEEE!" Peter shouted and hugged Lance as well. 

"What the…?" Lance yelped. 

"Hey Lance is back," Tabitha walked in. She turned and shouted. "Hey Jean, the father of your baby's here!" 

"SHUT UP TABITHA!" Jean stormed in. She glared at Lance. "And you…you…you…. AAGGGGGHGHHH!" She stormed out again. "Lance Alvers you are never going to touch me! EVER!" 

"Baby?" Lance started to twitch. "Uh could you two let me go now?"

"We are so glad to see you!" Peter sobbed. 

"Good old Lance!" Scott said happily. "Good old one of a kind single minded Lance!" 

"LANCE!" Remy shouted. "LET ME KILL HIM!" He charged at him.

"Don't even think about it!" Both Scott and Peter held him back. 

"HAS THIS ENTIRE MANSION GONE NUTS?" Lance yelled. "I'M GONE FOR A FEW DAYS AND THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS? WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED?" 

"You don't want to know," Ororo sighed as she trudged to Xavier's study. She opened the door. "Charles I….NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

There all around the room were several small cartoon like versions of Shipwreck. "HIYA DOLLFACE!" They shouted cheerfully. "REMEMBER US?" 

"**_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_**" Ororo screamed. 


End file.
